That Moment
by Christine Geyer
Summary: Sharon and Andy finally have "that" conversation. Post 3x13ish.


Andy stopped suddenly and turned around. He was just dropping her off from a wonderful dinner celebrating their closing of a case today. Rusty's accusations from their dinner with Nicole were on his mind anytime he and Sharon were together now. He took a deep breath and said "Sharon, what the hell are we doing here? We've both been avoiding this conversation, but I don't think I can put it off much longer."

'Are we really going to do this now?' Sharon wondered. She was still facing her door when she replied. "I know, Andy, but honestly, I'm scared. I'm scared that after we have this conversation everything is going to change, and I'm not sure if I'm ready for that." She turned around and watched as his face fell, and realized he thought she was setting up to reject him. "But," she continued, "you're right; we can't keep going on like this indefinitely." She saw he was just nervous as she was.

Andy saw her fear in her eyes. "Yeah, I get that. This scares the hell out of me too," he tried to assure her, "but after everything we've been through, shouldn't we be able to talk about this like adults? Let's just do it, and then come what may."

Sharon sighed. She really didn't want to do this, but she knew it was finally time. She was actually a little relieved that Andy started it so she didn't have to. "Okay. So let's start with facts," she figured that was a safe place to begin. At least she wouldn't have to talk about her feelings yet, because she still wasn't sure what they were. Her world turned a bit upside-down the night of The Nutcracker. "Many people in our lives suspected before we did that something was happening between us. We've been spending time together as friends outside of work. We've gotten to know each other well and enjoy each other's company. As that happened, our friendship carried over into our job, and others noticed our increased familiarity. Since you're a man and I'm a woman, they began to assume that our relationship was headed in a romantic direction, if not there already, although we both know we've never gone there."

Andy could tell she was stalling. He stopped her from continuing. "Yes, agreed. But, Sharon I'm not worried about what everyone else thinks right now. I think what we really need is to figure out what we want, and then if needed, we can decide how to handle the effect on those around us."

"Okay," Sharon conceded, "You start."

Andy rolled his eyes. So Sharon was going to be difficult. He realized he'd have to walk her through this, but that was okay, because she had walked him through a very difficult conversation with Nicole. It was probably his turn, anyway. "Okay," Andy said, "The first time I realized my family thought you were my girlfriend, not my friend, I was confused. The thought had never crossed my mind. In the moment, it seemed to benefit my relationship with my family, so I didn't correct it. As time passed, I regrettably let it continue. I briefly wondered what a relationship with you would be like, but as soon all the obstacles we would face became apparent, I pushed it out of my mind. Besides, we were just getting to know each other." Andy paused here to watch for her reaction. None of this was new info, but she was acting skittish, so he wasn't sure how she'd take it.

Sharon took his pause to mean that it was her turn. She was staring her hands the whole time, but she responded, "My initial impressions of you were completely wrong, but luckily I got the opportunity to get to know the real you. I learned about your story and I realized I mistook your passion for what you do as a quick temper. I realized you used your stubbornness to your advantage in overcoming your alcoholism. I also learned that while you at times were defensive, you are also willing to open up and give your loyalty and trust to those who deserve it." Sharon paused a moment. She hadn't shared this next part with him before, but she felt like it was the right moment. "I feel like you were one of the first detectives from Chief Johnson's old team to start supporting me as the new division head. The more I got to know you and fix my wrong impressions, the more admirable I found you."

Andy smiled even though Sharon wasn't looking at him. "This is all very nice. I think we're aware that we had a rocky start, but have grown close now. But our relationship with each other is a lot different that anyone else's on the squad which is what I think we need to clarify," Andy pointed out.

Sharon knew he was right. "Ah, yes. We spend time together. You're a man, and I'm a woman. The potential for attraction is what makes male/female friendship thing tricky," she reasoned.

Andy continued, "Yeah, so here's where the conversation gets uncomfortable," he laughed. Sharon smiled. Andy asked, "Is there attraction here? Putting aside for a second what Rusty and Nicole think, what Provenza thinks, what whoever else that it's none of their business thinks: Do we want to become romantically involved, or continue being close friends and providing each other with that emotional support we both seem to need?"

Finally, Sharon looked up at him. She was still apprehensive, but was also mildly relieved they were finally trying to get this settled. She raised one eyebrow at him and asked, "So who wants to go first?"

"I'll do it if we both agree to be honest and once it's out there, we'll decide from there," he offered, "And that we'll try our best to remain friends if our views don't agree and one or both of us end up disappointed."

"Agreed," she said. She knew that it might be easier said than done, but she was certainly willing to try. She didn't think she could handle completely losing his presence in her life. She was also very glad he was going first.

Andy took a moment to try and choose his words carefully. He finally started, "I think about my failed marriage a lot." Sharon raised her eyebrows. What did his ex have to do with this? It wasn't quite what she was expecting, but she respectfully let him continue. "Obviously we had problems due to my alcoholism, but we also married young and naïve. We had an amazing physical relationship, but as you and I both know, a real relationship requires a lot more than that. We didn't support each other like we should have. We weren't each other's most fervent advocates. We weren't willing to make sacrifices for one another and we didn't have the courage to make each other the best version of ourselves we could be." Andy gathered his courage because this next part was going to be the hardest for him to admit. It left him vulnerable and he didn't know how she'd take it. "I've never said this but I think you're beautiful, and not just on the outside. You support me and encourage me to do the right thing, but you call me on my crap. You don't let me slide and since you've been a part of my life, you've made me a better man. No matter where we stand at the end of this conversation, I am forever grateful to you for that. I see all the things in you that I was missing with my ex. I need you in my life, and I think I'm finally ready to admit that I'd like that to be as more than just good friends." There. He'd finally said it. It was out there, he was exposed, and all he could do was fidget with jacket while he waited to hear what Sharon had to say.

Sharon was stunned. She watched him, but noticed he wasn't able to look at her. She swallowed hard, both to muster up her courage and keep her emotions in check as Andy's words affected her in ways she didn't think possible. She really didn't know that's how he felt. She had hoped, but fantasy and reality can be very different places. It was time for her statement, and she wanted to make it very carefully. She suddenly was feeling braver and looked right at him as she responded, "I guess the advantage of our life experience is learning from our mistakes. My marriage started the same way: young and naïve. I've shared with you most of my history with Jack. What amazes me about when I'm with you is that you are about the first person outside of my own parents and children who have ever seemed to put my needs in front of their own." Andy looked up at her, surprised by what she said. "I've spent most of my career trying to take care of the LAPD officers in the best way I knew how in FID. It didn't earn me much popularity and the job required me to keep my emotions in check in order to stay professional. At home I had a husband who was mostly absent, but when he was present, he spent a lot of time accusing me of not supporting him and blaming everything on me. Once again I found myself needing to swallow my feelings for the sake of my children. It's become habit by now. Moving to Major Crimes and dealing with homicides and kidnappings and violence against children has been harder on me than I've let on," she admitted. She stepped closer to him and rested her hand on his arm. She continued, "And yet, you still seem to know just when I need someone and you make yourself available to me. It was so surprising to me at first, but now I can't imagine surviving the transfer to Major Crimes without your support. And it goes beyond professional support. Everyone has been amazing to Rusty, including you, but you've always taken the extra time to make sure I'm okay too when things are rough with him, or his mother has disappointed him again. I've gotten to the point where I can't imagine my life without you. I am scared to admit this, because of all the potential complications, but think the place you hold in my heart has been more than a friend for awhile, I just didn't see it." Sharon tried to read Andy's reaction. It seemed to be a mixture of relief, hope and joy.

Andy was hopeful, but cautious, too. "So," he said, "it sounds like we're on the same page? We want more, in the form a romantic relationship?"

Sharon laughed. "That sounds oddly formal, but yes, I think we're in agreement." Sharon was excited to discover what their future held, but she knew it was just going to get more complicated from here on out, so she made a request of Andy. "Before we have to move into a discussion of the messy logistics, complications, and ramifications of us becoming involved, can we just take a break for awhile and enjoy this moment?"

Andy smiled and nodded as he wrapped his arms around her. She returned the embrace, and as they held each other, a weight was temporarily lifted off both of them as they finally found the clarity they'd been seeking. They stayed that way for a while, enjoying the physical contact they'd both been longing for and breathing each other in. Finally, Sharon loosened her grip a bit and lifted her head to meet Andy's eyes. She smiled at him, and he felt like the luckiest man on Earth. He leaned down and kissed her for the first time. They both forgot everything else for one blissful moment.

As they broke apart, their eyes still closed, Andy broke the silence. "Wow."

Sharon smiled bashfully and chuckled. "Can I get you some coffee or water or something?" she said as moved away. She loved their moment, but she knew there was more to talk about and figured they may as well get comfortable.

Andy nodded, and headed towards Sharon's couch, his head swirling with what they were going to do. Admitting his feelings seemed like the hard part at first, but now that they were out in the open, figuring out what they were going to next seemed just as daunting. Sharon came back in shortly with two mugs and handed one to Andy. They sat for a moment, sipping their drinks and lost in thought. Then Sharon sat her mug down on the coffee table. She moved so she was sitting right next to him. She took his hand and maneuvered his arm around her shoulder and curled into him. Andy smiled down at her and placed a gentle peck on the top of her head. "So let's get this part over with. How do we make our personal and our professional relationships work simultaneously?" he asked.

Sharon sighed, "It seems so strange to me that Nicole came to me looking for advice on this very question just a few weeks ago. She thought I'd been balancing this gracefully for awhile, but honestly, I don't feel like I know at all. Although it's discouraged, it's not forbidden as long as we take the steps H.R. lined up to protect the department. I don't want us to risk our whole careers, so I think we should be honest and tell the people who absolutely need to know."

"So that would be who exactly?" Andy asked.

"The H.R. department and our supervisors: Taylor and Pope," she replied.

Andy groaned. "Alright. So telling the rest of our division is our choice?"

"It is," she answered. She was kind of hoping they could enjoy keeping this to themselves for awhile, but she wanted to get Andy's thoughts first. She didn't feel like they were doing anything wrong, and she didn't want him to think she wanted to hide from everyone.

"Okay, so pros and cons: Provenza thinks we've already been together awhile and just didn't realize it," Andy chuckled. "I guess he was halfway right. He's been watching anything we do with that assumption anyway, no matter how much I tried to tell him nothing was going on. If we tell everyone else, we risk them thinking any decision you make that involves me could be special treatment. They all know we socialize outside of work and they seem okay with it, but no one knows anything else for sure. If we tell them, we could be more open with our relationship at work, but it wouldn't be professional for us to really be bringing it up on the job anyway, right?" Andy looked down at her to try and get a read on her thinking. As much as he would love to run around holding her and or kissing her in her office, he knew that wasn't really an option on the job, even if they were peers in rank.

Sharon was relieved by his response. She felt a little more confident in sharing her feelings on the matter. "I would agree. Part of notifying Taylor and Pope would be for them to keep an eye on the special treatment issue. And we could tell them that we will be making the effort to keep our personal and professional relationship separated so they know we are making our best effort to handle this appropriately. By department policy, they would be handling any evaluations of you that I would normally do, so that particular hurdle is eliminated. It's a delicate situation. I don't think we need to run around and hide things like we are ashamed of what we are doing, but I don't think we need to bring it up unless it becomes relevant. We've been friends for awhile and I don't think it's compromised our ability to objective on the job. Let them suspect what they want, but let's just focus on us and not bring everyone else into it."

"I think I can live with that," Andy smiled.

"Alright, I can contact H.R. and I'll let you know what we need to do as we go along," Sharon offered. She sat up on the couch and turned her body to face him so they could see each other better. Andy looked at her with a huge grin on his face. She couldn't help but smile back. "What?" she asked.

"We're really doing this," he said.

"We really are," she said. She leaned over to him and gently brushed her lips against his. He raised his free and hand and ran his thumb along her jaw for a moment before pulling her close with his free hand and deepening the kiss. Just as they were both thinking this might be a nice way to spend the rest of the evening, they heard the handle on the front door turning. Sharon broke the contact and quickly scooted to the other end of the couch. She might've forgotten about Rusty for a moment there.

Rusty walked in and right as he was about to say hello his eyes took in scene in front of them. Two coffee mugs sat forgotten on the coffee table. Andy had an amused expression on his face and Sharon had a guilty one on hers and was slightly out of breath. Her fingers were resting just below her nose, covering her mouth. It was obvious to him what he had just walked in on.

"Hey," he said knowingly, "so, uh, what are you guys up to tonight?"

"Oh, just talking," Sharon replied. "Thinking about renting a movie if you want to join us," she added.

That was about the last thing he wanted. If they were finally getting things figured out, he didn't want to be in the way. "Nah, I'm good. I'm just going to head to room and unwind a little before bedtime. 'Night Sharon, 'night Lieutenant" he nodded at both as he started to head down the hall to his room.

"Good night," they both replied, relieved to get a few more moments to themselves before Andy had to leave.

Rusty turned around and said, "Oh, by the way Lieutenant, you've got a little lipstick on your face there." Sharon snorted. Andy wiped at his face and laughed at Sharon's reaction. Rusty smirked and quickly headed to his room.

"Guess we don't have to worry about how to tell the kid, eh?" Andy laughed again.

"No, I guess we don't," she said, smiling. "So, uh, where were we?" she asked as she scooted back to her previous position on the sofa.

"Picking a movie, I think," Andy laughed.

"Hmm, that sounds about right," she said as she leaned into him and picked up right where she had left off when they had first heard the door.


End file.
